so i know everyone wants the eye candy, since it takes the least amount of effort on a reader's part. but until i have all the pics (and you know there are TONS of them) organized and edited, i'm not uploading any of them. but here is something to make you chuckle in the meantime:
TOP 10 QUESTIONS ASKED TO GUEST SERVICES ON A CRUISE SHIP:
10. Do the stairs go up or down?
9. Does the crew stay on-board?
8. Does the elevator take me to the front of the ship?
7. If I flush the toilet while sitting on it, what will happen to me?
6. Does the ship create its own electricity?
5. If the pictures don't have any numbers on them, how will I know which one is mine?
4. I have the popcorn in the microwave but I can't figure out how to get it to turn on.
3. Does the toilet use fresh water or salt water?
2. What do you do with the ice sculptures after they melt?
1. What time is the midnight buffet?
1.25.2011
1.08.2011
excellent stolen words
so, at the risk of publicly declaring to one of my friends that i'm a facebook stalker, i have stolen something from him because it was just too fabulously hilarious NOT to share! but, as you read through these, please remind yourself they're not my words. they're someone else's. i don't want to take credit, although i can relate to thinking every single one!
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
thanks bunches JC for the laughs. sorry for the thievery but funnies just need to be passed on.
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
thanks bunches JC for the laughs. sorry for the thievery but funnies just need to be passed on.
1.05.2011
WORD OF THE MONTH {genshai}
so, i can't seem to get kevin's book out of my head. and i used it when we did family home evening this week. i introduced the yahoos to GENSHAI. i explained to them what it is and read some excerpts from kevin's book. i have decided that each month i will take a new word from kevin's book and focus on it. i will constantly remind myself of it's meaning and try to put forth effort to live it, and also be on the lookout for those around me that exemplify it.
so january's focus is on GENSHAI (GEN-shy). the person that taught kevin this word said this:
so january's focus is on GENSHAI (GEN-shy). the person that taught kevin this word said this:
"As children, we were taught to never look at, touch, or address another person in a way that would make them feel small. If I were to walk by a beggar in the street and casually toss him a coin, I would not be practicing Genshai. But if I knelt down on my knees and looked him in the eye when I placed that coin in his hand, that coin became love. Then and only then, after I had exhibited pure, unconditional brotherly love, would I become a true practitioner of Genshai."I have tried, each day, to keep this word on the forefront of my mind. I believe that it has helped me to be less critical of others, and also myself. I believe it has brought to my attention more people who are providing service around me. I will continue to remember GENSHAI throughout the month of january (and hopefully after) and will keep you posted of my progress.
1.02.2011
strong tree or scrubby thing?
GOOD TIMBER
- by Douglas Malloch
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.
The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.
Good timber does not grow with ease:
The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
The further sky, the greater length;
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.
Where thickest lies the forest growth,
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.
~kevin hall referred to this poem in one of his conference calls and i've fallen in love with it. i hope for strong winds and scars that i might grow good timber someday.
1.01.2011
ASPIRE overflow
our good friend KEVIN HALL has written a book that was published in the spring of this year. we finally (after not talking with him for about 10 years) got back in touch with him. i ordered his book and read it in a day. it's amazing. for me, words can't describe it; which is ironic since it's all about words itself. every time i hear kevin speak i want to share and pass on every word. it's so hard to take notes on his speeches or his writings, as every word of it is always so fabulous.
here's the book:
clicking on the book will take you to kevin's website where you can find links to order the book, learn more about him, and see dates for his speaking engagements and training.
kevin is an amazing person, and i knew that long ago when i first met him. but every time i hear him speak or get a note from him, he continues to awe and inspire me. the pages of this book were no exception. i learned new words and techniques. i gained new perspectives on life and myself. of course, the part where i apply them and utilize them all comes down to me. that's the challenge, isn't it? no one else can make the change except YOU. but in a time where i thought i had lost faith and hope, and even the means to gain it back, kevin's words (and remembering times we've spent with him) sparked new hope. i am so grateful to that, no matter how small it is. at this point, i'll take what i can get.
2010 was one of the best years i've had in awhile. no i'm not extremely old, but i do have 35 others to compare it to. i am now hopeful i can make 2011 even better. yes i'm a grinch during the christmas season, but i am grateful for friends that allowed me to serve them so i could keep a smile on my face through it all. i'm grateful to my doc for his never ending supply of patience with me. i am grateful to put another christmas behind and look forward to another year of fun adventures (and hopefully TONS of travel!).
here's the book:
clicking on the book will take you to kevin's website where you can find links to order the book, learn more about him, and see dates for his speaking engagements and training.
kevin is an amazing person, and i knew that long ago when i first met him. but every time i hear him speak or get a note from him, he continues to awe and inspire me. the pages of this book were no exception. i learned new words and techniques. i gained new perspectives on life and myself. of course, the part where i apply them and utilize them all comes down to me. that's the challenge, isn't it? no one else can make the change except YOU. but in a time where i thought i had lost faith and hope, and even the means to gain it back, kevin's words (and remembering times we've spent with him) sparked new hope. i am so grateful to that, no matter how small it is. at this point, i'll take what i can get.
2010 was one of the best years i've had in awhile. no i'm not extremely old, but i do have 35 others to compare it to. i am now hopeful i can make 2011 even better. yes i'm a grinch during the christmas season, but i am grateful for friends that allowed me to serve them so i could keep a smile on my face through it all. i'm grateful to my doc for his never ending supply of patience with me. i am grateful to put another christmas behind and look forward to another year of fun adventures (and hopefully TONS of travel!).
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